Beers I Miss

I have not always lived in New York. I know, it’s a shocker. Honestly though, I spent the first couple years of college in Texas at Rice University. And now, if you’re from the North (and particularly the North-East), you’re thinking “Oh my god… Texas? Uch…” and you’d be wrong. I actually had, and still have, a lot of love for Texas. And now, I’m going to lay down one more shocker: you can’t get every beer in New York.


There are beers that I still miss from Texas and from other parts of the world, and I’d just like to take a few minutes and… indulge…

Shiner Bock

Brewed in Shiner, Texas, Shiner Bock may just be the best beer in Texas. It’s a dark amber colored Bavarian style, lot of flavor and a great looking label. The label’s sort of a mustard color with the head of a huge stag on it. If anything makes for a more manly looking beer label, I can’t imagine it. You go much more man than that, you just wind up with a bottle that has a huge pair of two hairy balls on it, and that’s…. that’s just bad for business. Quick question: what kind of beer would you imagine going in that bottle, and why am I suddenly so certain it’s something Belgian?

Fat Tire
Why the fuck is Fat Tire NOWHERE in the Northeast? Fat Tire was the first beer I ever drank at a bar. There was a simple reason for this: I was 16. Texas has these great pseudo-bars set up that are built into the constitution from the days back before Air Conditioning and Houston being livable. They’re called Ice Houses, and if you ever visit Texas, you should go to one. Here’s the deal, way back in the day, you had to travel Ice around Texas. Why, you ask? Because it’s hot. Texas is very hot. So they’d store the ice within Ice Houses, and one day, someone starts saying to his buddy, “Hey, I have all this beer and well… why can’t I keep this in the Ice House too?” Texas can be rather rational when the spirit hits it, and all of a sudden, Ice Houses become large open-air bars. I still remember looking up at the woman selling beer the first time and asking for mine. She gives me this look, “Are you twenty-one?” Yes. Yes I am.

But anyway, Fat Tire’s awesome. That was sort of the point. But it got lost. These things happen. Belgian style beer from Colorado. Good stuff.

I know what you’re thinking. Your brain just backfired. You’re going, “Jake, you can’t stand Bud and you can get it here,” and you’re sort of right. I guess it’s not the Budweiser I miss as much as the bottles of it. See, Texas is sort of it’s own market. It’s the only state I’ve ever seen where Budweiser actually makes a label, just for Texas. Take a look at a Budweiser bottle in Texas; you’ll notice that the outline of the lone-star state is actually drawn on the label. You’ll also notice that every Chevy commercial ends with a man with a really gravelly voice crooning, “Chevy, drivin’ Texas!” It’s little things like that that sort of let you get the whole Texas thing a bit, the love of state that I’ve never seen anywhere else in the country.

So now that I’ve waded deep into my nostalgia for a few words, who wants to buy me a plane ticket?

– Jake


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